Me (while emptying out Steven’s backpack): What’s this?
Steven: Oh, that’s a valentine.
Me: For me? (I swear, there wasn’t a hint of desperation in my voice)
Steven: Well, it’s for all of you.
Me: It’s very sweet.
Steven: There are some things on there that aren’t true.
Me: There is something on here that you love more than me? (I swear there wasn’t a hint of distain in my voice)
Steven: A few things.
Me: And they are?
Steven: Dylan and Kirby. I love those things more than you.
At least I rank higher than haircuts…